Day 2 (Technically day 3... but I didn't have time yesterday!)
So, I just went to check my blog from the 14th, and apparently it isn't there. Not quite sure what's going on with that, but I did do one.
In case nobody else can see it, I'll give you a brief run down.
I'm Kirsty, I'm 22, I have a four year old son named Luke, who has Autism (ASD).
This is me and my baby!
I started this blog, because a friend of mine and one of her beautiful daughters, have each started a blog. Tanya - you are my inspiration :). Tasha - you are a beautiful, strong, intelligent young lady and I'm very proud of you for opening up to the world.
Tanya's blog is about having 3 daughters, each with illnesses, and the ups, downs and in between bits of life. It is witty, insightful and brilliantly written.
Tasha's is about living with M.E and is heart wrenching, beautifully done and allows people with the same, or similar illness to relate to someone else.
Links - Tasha's... natashamawer.blogspot.com
Tanya's...crazypurplemama.blogspot.com
Anyway, back to us.
Today, I received a letter from the special educational needs department and Luke has a place at our chosen school! YAY! They have an excellent special resources centre and specialises in autism. Which is brilliant. And he is going with another boy from our nursery, so he will have somebody there that he knows! So, we had some good news today - however, Luke has been a nightmare!
Luke's nursery is 1.2 miles away from our house, which is nothing for us, for Luke this is nearly impossible. We usually ride my bike - I say we, I do the pedalling and Luke sits on the handle bars looking cute as always. (It's not fair! Long gone are the days when I could sit around looking cute!)
Currently, my bike is broken. Which means walking to and from nursery 5 days a week, come rain or shine. Luke can walk, he just chooses not to, he constantly wants to be carried and for a 4 year old he is tall and he is heavy (he wears an age 5-6 in clothes), and my back just can't take it. Whilst holding hands, he bites or pinches the back of your hand, to which the immediate reaction is to let go, and then he runs off - quite merrily I might add - towards the road and into on coming traffic! He has no safety awareness of anything and is a constant danger to himself and others around him. Thankfully, our support worker, Fiona, is trying to get us a disability pushchair for him so that it's safe to take him out for long periods of time. Fingers crossed!
Luke gets bored really easily and some days, no matter what you try to do to entertain him he just isn't interested. Today has been one of those days.
Luke enjoys lots of things, it's just finding the facilities that will put up with a special needs child. As I mentioned in my last blog, Luke doesn't play well with others. He struggles to interact with his peers, has trouble sharing, communicating and understanding reactions and emotions. Often other children refuse to play with him because he is 'weird' - a child at nursery actually said this! Needless to say, I had words with the child's mother. Luke loves to play outside, get wet and muddy, climb on things - typical boy stuff. However, finding places that will allow him to be himself are few and far between. Soft play isn't really an option because he is rough and boisterous, the local park isn't an option on weekends because he has been known to push other children off things he wants to go on. Sadly, our area doesn't seem to have many autism friendly places.
Our local cinema has started an Autism Friendly Screening which is fantastic! it's only once a month, but you can take your own food, the sound is lower, the lights are up, there are no annoying adverts and you can move around throughout the film. it's really great to see that places are taking notice of the alarmingly high increase in autism diagnosis and doing something about it.
Autism is an invisible disability. Luke looks like a completely normal child. When he has meltdowns/anxiety people look and stare, tut and make unnecessary comments. I've had people tell me I shouldn't have had a child if I can't handle it, it's clearly bad parenting because I'm a young mother (I don't agree, I know some 'young' mothers who are better parents than the middle-aged mothers!). I've had people tell me that Luke is spoilt, and others telling me to give him what he wants to shut him up. I have had people walk past and say "that child needs a slap". None of this is helpful to the current situation, myself or my child. So please, if you see a child behaving badly, don't automatically assume that it is the bad parenting or anything. Sometimes it is a child with an invisible disability like autism or many of the others that are out there. Short of tattooing I'M AUTISTIC on Luke's head, I'm not entirely sure how to make people understand. But until my dying day I will continue to try and find a way.
Again, thank you for having patience with me throughout my ranting and venting. It means a lot to me. Even if just one person reads this, I hope it helps you.
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