Funny People

11/5/14

So, it still astounds me how people can be so ignorant of the world and the things in it.
Luke and I went to the shop earlier on today and he had a bit of meltdown. Not a massive one but big enough to cause a scene. One particular lady wouldn't stop staring at him and I calmly said, "don't worry, he's autistic. He'll stop when he's ready." And this is the bit that really got me. This very ignorant lady said "Autism is an American thing, so he can't possibly have it. You should be ashamed of yourself for wishing a disability on your child!" After I'd finished laughing (because of the sheer stupidity of that statement) I quite calmly said, "oh, I hadn't realised that. Next time I'll try and pick something a bit more British." And walked out, without getting what we needed.
I was truly shocked that apparently autism is just for the Americans. Does that make us honorary Americans? I know he can't have caught it from an American because we haven't been to America and we haven't met anybody from America. So in that case, how did an American disease/disability get its claws into my son?! How dare it attack my baby? Call the police, the FBI, interpol, the military! Raise the alarm, there is some kind of autism flu or something.
Oh wait, I just realised... Autism isn't racist, or country-ist (I know that's not a word but you know what I mean). It doesn't care where you live, or how rich or poor your family is. It doesn't care if you're from Britain, America or Africa. It doesn't care if you are black, white or green. AUTISM DOESN'T CARE!

It amazes me that even with the rise in autism spectrum diagnosis people still don't know all that much about it. People seem to only know about autism if they know somebody with it, or somebody's child has it. On the one hand, I'm truly grateful that only one other person I know has an autistic child (not counting Luke's nursery friends) but also saddened that just because it's not affecting them personally, doesn't mean the ignorance is ok. 
There are varying types and severities of Autism, like with most things. Compared to some Luke has a pretty bum deal, compared to others he's been pretty lucky. Many have ASD as well as some other problem, so we have been relatively  lucky. Still, I wouldn't wish Autism on anybody - even my worst enemy. It is a cruel and horrible disability. It separates you from other people.
Most people don't understand how I can get so excited about the little things that Luke does. Most people will see something I've put on Facebook and think 'he's 4, he should have been doing that a long time ago', but Luke has never been like other children - but that was bound to happen with me as his mother!!
Actually, I wish Autism on everybody. Not in a nasty way. Not permanently. Just for a day, or a week, so that people can see how difficult yet rewarding it truly is.
Luke and I have a bond that I think is pretty unique. And I think that his Autism is the reason behind it. Luke knows (as he has seen it first hand) that I will always champion his cause. I will always stick up for him and love him unconditionally as all parents do. But this goes beyond that. All parents will say the same things that I just have, but their children aren't under constant scrutiny for the way they behave or the way they talk or the way that they have a meltdown because there's a strange smell or too much noise, or too many people. I am always aware of the people around us, I've gotten pretty good at judging a situation and working out whether all of my attention needs to go on Luke or whether I need to get my guard up because someone will start. I always give my all to Luke, and I think he knows this.
I was asked the other day if I regretted having a child at 18, and honestly the answer is no. I'm not missing out on anything. The 'normal' people my age are going out drinking, and learning to drive and have just finished university... but Luke has given me an education like no other. He has taught me the meaning of true, unconditional love and loyalty. Then, I was asked if I regretted having a disabled child. As it was a friend, I didn't automatically go on destroyer mode - any one who knows me, knows that I turn into a big angry mama bear defending her cubs when people say things like that. Again, the answer is no. I don't regret Luke being 'disabled'. I don't really see him as disabled, a pain in the arse yes, but not disabled as such. Compared to other children he may be 'the special one', or 'that naughty child'. To me he isn't disabled, he is differently abled. He can do things that other children his age can't. Does that make them disabled? No, it just means that they have different strengths and weaknesses.

Even the 'normal' children have different strengths and weaknesses from the other 'normal' children, it's just the way of the world. Let's face it, the world would be pretty boring if we were all good at the same things.